(Another version of Letter I)
Reply to an absurdly romantic Letter
Cincinnati, April 25, 18--
Sir: I do not know whether your epistle was intended in a jest, in which case its absurdity might have been excused on the ground of its plagiarisms. But if you can really write in earnest to any woman whom you profess to esteem, I must express my humble opinion that such is not the proper course by which to excite a reciprocal feeling.
Regretting that you should have adopted a tone of writing, which neither modern usage not common sense at any time would sanction,
Your obedient servant.
To Mr. ...