These boots were made for...

cookies!

 

'One of these days these boots gonna throw cookies all over you.'

but only if it falls from a shelf and the lid comes off.

The Lady's Letter-Writer: Letter XVII

Letter XVII

A Widow, in Answer to Proposals

Kingston, July 14, 18--

Dear Sir:-- I take the first opportunity of acknowledging the receipt of the flattering letter with which you favored me.  You wish to know if I am willing to enter again into the marriage state, and in the event of my being so, whether I should be averse to admitting you in the quality of a suitor.  I assure you, sir, I feel flattered by the latter question, and as to the former, I can only say, that I have no dislike to entering again into that state.  But our acquaintance at present is imperfect, and we are comparatively strangers to each others tastes and tempers.  I need scarcely observe that an intimate knowledge of such matters is absolutely requisite before we can decide whether we are fitted for enjoying a partnership in life.  Meanwhile, I have no objection to allowing such freedom of acquaintance as shall enable us to arrive at this knowledge, and can therefore only say, in conclusion, that the commencement of your addresses will meet with no obstacle from, 

                                                                        Dear sir,

                                                                            Your's most faithfully,

                                                                         ...........  .........

To:.... , Esq.

the Tuesday Song of the Week

I can't hear this song without going back a hundred years, sitting in the back seat of my parents' car, along with my brothers, driving home at night from the shore.

'Solitary Man' - Neil Diamond

a little bit of soap

80 year-old soap!

Deck your walls

with awesomeness!

The Lady's Letter Writer: Letter XVI

I'm sorry I forgot all about this yesterday.  Anyway...

Letter XVI

To the Gentleman

(as relates to the last two letters)

Newport, September 10th, 18--

My Dear Sir:-- You will be delighted to hear that mamma is in every way favorable to our attachment.  I must say our -- for I now feel under no restraint in confessing that my partiality for you is closely akin to a deeper feeling.  Let us, however (as she herself advises,) seek to know each other's temperament and character more thoroughly ere we take too decided steps.  Let us learn each other's little humors and wishes, that we may the better know wherein we have to make allowance for, and yield to, one another.

I trust I shall see mamma in a few days, when I am sure her favorable opinion of you will be more and more confirmed.

                                           Believe me, my dear sir,

                                           Very sincerely yours,

                                                             ........ ...........

To: ...., Esq.

That's a croc

Specifically a crocodile briefcase.

 even more specifically, black horned crocodile brief case

and more specifically than that, a GENUINE black horned crocodile briefcase.

or attache case.

  Your choice.